The Great Equalizer

Ok, readers (if you're out there). The time has come; I can't lie to you (or cyberspace) anymore. So hear ye, hear ye, I have a confession to make:

I love bad weather. Especially when it involves frozen molecules of water drifting through the sky and accumulating on my fire escape and sending the entire city into a frenzy over yet another Snowpocalypse.

There, I said it. No more beating around the bush; no more sitting around with friends and coworkers, groaning, "Oh nooo, not AGAIN!" and "Is it spring yet?", when secretly I'm cackling to myself and doing that awkward finger-twiddle move under the table, although my stubby digits just don't do that move justice. (Sidenote: please tell me I am not the only one whose phalanges are vertically challenged. Having short, fat fingers has always made really important activities, like being an evil mastermind, slightly out of my reach. It has also caused more than one person to laugh at me while I give them "the cutest little finger in the world.")

But I digress.

I went to bed last night woefully disappointed. "They" had spent all week predicting this major, "might hit us and dump two feet or might miss us and give all those kids who stayed-up-too-late-playing-Lego-Harry-Potter-and -drinking-too-much-wine soda-instead-of-doing-housework homework major coronaries upon awakening" storm. Yet, when I finally turned in around 11, there was maaaybe an inch on the ground, the skies were clear and the squealing of the T had yet to be drowned out by the hum of snowplows. My hopes for yet another winter wonderland appeared to have been dashed at the dastardly hands of incompetent meteorologists. To be fair, I had suspected as much; they've correctly predicted the last five storms, so everyone knew they were due for a major mistake sooner or later... weatherpeople don't just go around predicting correct weather all the time; they'd lose their credibility and, at least in this state, probably be tried for witchcraft.

Imagine my delight when I woke up to this:

Awwww yeah; that's what I'm talkin' about! I didn't even have to get out of bed to see the damage; the glow coming through the blinds was enough to send the grin across my face. Well, that and waking up to this:

  

which is, of course, what I wake up to every morning. Best. Birthday Present. EVER. I've commissioned both the cowboy and police officer models from my best friend, as well as offered to front the capital needed to take these babies public. And no, I'm not dumb enough to be like that guy in The Social Network/ Facebook saga. Give me shares or give me death!

The reason I love snow and other various inclement weather so much actually has nothing to do with the potential to shirk my duties for a day and take a snow day. Or that it gives me a ready-made excuse to stay home in my jammies and watch Julie & Julia for the 300th time with no shame. It doesn't even have to do with the fact that I live across the street from a convenience store, a packie ("liquor store" to those of you outsiders) and a pizza joint, or that all three of these places will deliver for a very nominal fee (Get my pant legs wet and dirty? No thank you).

No, it has to do with something a little less selfish: the young people who take the extra 20 minutes to clear out their elderly neighbor's driveway, the "good mornings!", disgruntled sighs and eyerolls shared by complete strangers as they shovel off their cars, the camaraderie that exists on the subway as everyone waits for HOURS for the T to finally show up at the station, and everyone piles in like sardines and gives up the kind of personal space that would normally require a dinner invitation first. It's the feeling of going down to the local dive bar and finding it completely packed, with people sharing tables, wings and laughter with people they never would have spoken to before, but it's ok now, because there is snow, and what you do and what you wear don't matter, because everyone has bad hair, no makeup and wet socks. Snow is the great equalizer; it brings us all together with its major hassel-tude and annoyance and turns us all into better people.

Until, of course, it's all over, the magic has been lost, the white fluff has turned to brown puddles of slush and those same people you yucked it up with the night before are the ones who will smash your mirror for trying to park in "their" space. 

But, for now, it's a winter wonderland of white:

Cheers, everyone!